There are two big mistakes that we (I mean the depressed) tend to make on the threshold of a new year.
The first mistake: looking back and reflecting too much on the miseries, failures, bleak moments and near-suicidal moments of the past unhappy year. Thoughts like “Another Year I Wasted” are not really helpful. Right now, maybe it’s better to not weigh and evaluate what already belongs to the past. New Year’s Eve is just not the best moment to attempt a cruel, shattering self-analysis. It’s better if (for example) you try to step outside and look at the midnight fireworks, even if you don’t really like the bangs. Just concentrate on some thing in the Here and Now.
(image by aeroart at abstractatus.com)
The second mistake: looking upon the new year as some huge steep dark mountain that threateningly and insuperably towers in front of us. Thoughts like “Oh my God, how will I ever get through another year of this” may be hard to avoid, but such thoughts really are not helpful either. Try to focus not on the whole massive year in front of you: focusing on what you are going to do the next couple of days will be much more productive.
Of course there’s also a third New Year mistake: a fairly common one that we share with many healthy not-depressed people. It’s committing ourselves to Too-Good Intentions: resolutions that are too ambitious, too inflated, too difficult to actually keep. In the first weeks of January, there will always be people feeling miserable, even hating themselves, because they failed to live up to their own over-optimistic goals. Don’t be one of them. If you must start the year with some kind of self-improving resolution, great… but do pick a modest one that is within reach.
Evidently we cannot ignore the fact that the beginning of a new year is some kind of symbolic milestone. Maybe, if people near us are throwing some kind of New Year party, it’s an idea to… just for a few moments, you know? All I wanted to say with this post is, don’t make more fuss of the whole thing than you can bear.
I’m not feeling particularly well at the moment; I fear I’ve already been making mistakes One and Two myself (I often stupidly ignore my own sensible warnings). So, enough of this now. You are entitled to the customary StayOnTop New Year Card. I hope you don’t mind that for once, I could do no better than this:
You’re welcome. But maybe rather than my lame though I assure you very well-meant wishes, what you really need is a beautiful and at the same time not over-optimistic song. So here is the wonderful New York band Palomar with The Planeiac from their 2004 album Palomar III: The Revenge of Palomar.
Palomar – The Planeiac
For a full StayOnTop playlist, see the Music page.